TSA Advice: When Flying, Leave Your Chainsaw at Home

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Most people pack clothes, underwear and a toothbrush when flying. Then there are those passengers who do not travel light. The Miami Herald says they have attempted to carry on the following items at Miami International Airport: A three-foot long machete. A can of Frontiersman Bear Repellent. A sword hidden inside a dragon-head cane. A 19-pound pipe wrench. Brass knuckles worn as belt buckles. A decorative grenade. A rubber gas mask studded with two dozen real bullets. Lots of guns–paint guns, a stun gun, and a pink revolver with matching pink “cat’s eyes,” a martial arts weapon effective for stabbing an enemy in the throat.

Screeners have seen everything but a kitchen sink inside luggage. There was a fully fueled gas chainsaw. A car door. And a bleeding alligator head. So the next time you complain about the miserably long lines at the airport, pity the poor Transportation Security Administration officers and blame your clueless fellow passengers. As the busy summer season is heating up, TSA is begging travelers to pay attention to the rules because “preparedness can have a significant impact on the airport screening experience and the amount of time spent waiting at security checkpoints nationwide.”

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